Melinda Mills

*** W16 8/15 page 15, pf 8. “Although the Bible does not provide specific rules about the kinds and limits of love play that might be associated with natural sexual intimacy, it mentions displays of affection. (Song of Sol. 1:2; 2:6) Christian marriage partners should treat each other with tenderness.”
 
Hi Comfort, re the above, I appreciate your mentioning these things difficult subjects as you have successfully done before; communications on these things is necessary, so don’t give up. (It is like discussing sex with your pre-teens, unpleasant to some people but it is necessary.) However, please note this reference says “natural” sexual intimacy. I believe people should understand the Bible and the spirit behind God’s laws, as well as perceiving that the will of God is when it is not spelled out. So I beg to disagree with you here. In fact I like what was written before time and which has not been mentioned much recently. For this reason I continue to believe what I see here in “True peace and Security – How Can You Find it”.
 
*** tp chap. 13 pp. 149-151 Your View of Sex—What Difference Does It Make? ***
Wisely Avoiding All Uncleanness and Sexual Greed
17 Sexual relations plainly have a proper place in the lives of married persons. God provided this as the means by which children would be produced, and also as a source of pleasure to the parents. (Genesis 9:1; Proverbs 5:18, 19; 1 Corinthians 7:3-5) Nevertheless, he warned against abusing this gift.—Ephesians 5:5.
18 Because of the emphasis placed on sex today, many young folks find that their desire for sexual satisfaction is aroused even before they are in position to marry. As a result, some of them seek pleasure through self-stimulation of their sexual parts. This is masturbation, or self-abuse. Is it a proper or wise practice?
19 The Scriptures counsel: “Deaden, therefore, your body members that are upon the earth as respects fornication, uncleanness, sexual appetite, hurtful desire, and covetousness.” (Colossians 3:5) Is one who practices masturbation ‘deadening his body members as respects sexual appetite’? On the contrary, he is stimulating the sexual appetite. The Bible urges that one avoid the thinking and conduct that lead to such problems, replacing them with wholesome activity, and that one cultivate self-control. (Philippians 4:8; Galatians 5:22, 23) When earnest effort is put forth to do this, such self-abuse can be avoided, with benefits mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.
20 What the Bible says respecting “uncleanness, sexual appetite, hurtful desire” applies to all Christians, single and married. It is true that husband and wife have a Scriptural right to engage in sexual relations with each other. But does this mean that they can throw off all restraint? The fact that God’s Word urges all Christians to cultivate self-control argues against such a view. (2 Peter 1:5-8) The inspired Bible writer did not have to explain the natural way in which the reproductive organs of husband and wife complement each other. Homosexual relations obviously cannot follow this natural way. So, male and female homosexuals employ other forms of intercourse in what the apostle refers to as “disgraceful sexual appetites” and “obscene” practices. (Romans 1:24-32) Could married couples imitate such homosexual forms of intercourse in their own marriage and still be free in God’s eyes from expressing “disgraceful sexual appetites” or “hurtful desire”?
21 On considering what the Scriptures say, a person may realize that his former thinking on these matters was molded by those who are, as the Bible says, “past all moral sense.” But, with God’s help, one can “put on the new personality,” which is molded in accord with God’s standards of righteousness. (Ephesians 4:17-24) In this way a person shows that he truly means it when he says that he wants to do God’s will. Your View Vitally Affects Your Peace and Security
22 Applying the counsel of God’s Word as respects sexual morality is not burdensome. Contrast the fruitage of the course the Bible outlines with the world’s high rate of divorce, broken homes, delinquent children, prostitution, disease, and the violence and murders committed in connection with sexual passion. (Proverbs 7:10, 25-27) How evident the wisdom of God’s Word! When you reject worldly thinking based on selfish desire and bring your thinking into harmony with Jehovah’s counsel, your heart is greatly strengthened in right desires. Instead of fleeting pleasures of sexual immorality, you enjoy a clean conscience and enduring peace of mind. Marriage and family ties are fortified with the growth of mutual trust between marriage mates and with respect from the children.
23 And do not lose sight of the fact that your very hope of eternal life is involved. So Scriptural morality will contribute to more than your present health. (Proverbs 5:3-11) It will become part of the evidence that you truly deplore the detestable things done by people who have no regard for God and that you have been ‘marked’ for survival into God’s “new earth,” where, not immorality, but righteousness is to dwell. How vital, then, that you ‘do your utmost now to be found finally by God spotless and unblemished and in peace.’—Ezekiel 9:4-6; 2 Peter 3:11-14. Further, I think the will of God in these things can be perceived and it is not left up to the persons in their bedroom to do what they wish. Servants of God are always in God’s view and presence. I think these scriptures bear on the topic.
(Ephesians 5:17) On this account stop being unreasonable, but keep perceiving what the will of Jehovah is.
God’s will can be perceived when we get to know him well from studying the things he says he likes and the things he says he hates.
(Proverbs 3:5, 6) Trust in Jehovah with all your heart, And do not rely on your own understanding. 6 In all your ways take notice of him, And he will make your paths straight.
(Jude 7) . . .. 7 In the same manner, Sodʹom and Go•morʹrah and the cities around them also gave themselves over to gross sexual immorality and pursued unnatural fleshly desires; they are placed before us as a warning example by undergoing the judicial punishment of everlasting fire.
If he can see our heart and know our thinking, he surely is interested in everything we do – so nothing is out of his range. In all our ways we should take notice of what he wants us to do (bedroom included). We should like the things he likes, and hate the things he hates. Proper view would not come overnight but we can work on it as a work in progress. We will get there. For example, if we are diagnosed with a common disease such as diabetes, hypertension, etc., we don’t go along as usual if we wish a cure or have it under control, we amend our regimen, more exercise, proper diet, less salt, etc. Because we might like certain foods, that does not mean that we can’t forego them so we can have better health. God expects us to give up things that we once did that were part of this world’s darkness so as to have his friendship.
On the matter of the “harm” that is done to couples who desisted from practicing them after coming into the truth, that could be said for also refusing to take blood or obedience to other Godly requirements. We took up our torture stake and agreed to suffer to be friends with God. Anyway, God says he is teaching us to benefit ourselves.
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On the matter of the Royal Commission, this showed up a lot of deficiencies, many of which were well itemized in your post. Hope these would be handled better from now on. Recently a letter was read emphasizing that matters of child abuse should be reported to the authorities.

As long as imperfect people are given authority over others, there will be misuse of that power. We can sympathize with some of the victims; for example, an old sister personally told me she was disfellowshipped in the olden days for passing a loaf of bread through the Kingdom Hall window. Of course, my mum had already told me about it. Sounds unbelievable?
At the time the sister told me, she had sat me down to tell me about the foibles of many of the leading brothers at the time, especially what they did in their youth. They were all behaving in a fleshly manner, although they had authority in the congregation.
The old sister in question left the congregation in her area and traveled to a farther congregation and was faithful until her death.
Once an overseer became despotic in those days, there was not much recourse - you either stayed or you left. People were not confident or very well educated, so they saw no recourse. The ones who were so wounded tended to talk about it over and over. As you can see the sister was still relating her experience - now to my generation. She was passing on the history of injustice.That is probably the only outlet she and others saw at the time.
Injustice might be less blatant now, but things will still happen (e.g. child abuse not dealt with adequately).
The only solution I see is the comfort mentioned in Isaiah 65:17: "17 For look! I am creating new heavens and a new earth; And the former things will not be called to mind, Nor will they come up into the heart."
But Jehovah will act: (Ezekiel 34:1-10) 34 The word of Jehovah again came to me, saying: 2 “Son of man, prophesy against the shepherds of Israel. Prophesy, and say to the shepherds, ‘This is what the Sovereign Lord Jehovah says: “Woe to the shepherds of Israel, who have been feeding themselves! Is it not the flock that the shepherds should feed? 3 You eat the fat, you clothe yourselves with the wool, and you slaughter the fattest animal, but you do not feed the flock. 4 You have not strengthened the weak or healed the sick or bandaged the injured or brought back the strays or looked for the lost; rather, you have ruled them with harshness and tyranny. 5 So they were scattered because there was no shepherd; they were scattered and became food for every wild beast of the field. 6 My sheep were straying on all the mountains and on every high hill; my sheep were scattered over all the surface of the earth, with no one searching for them or seeking to find them. 7 “‘“Therefore, you shepherds, hear the word of Jehovah: 8 ‘“As surely as I am alive,” declares the Sovereign Lord Jehovah, “because my sheep have become prey, food for every wild beast of the field, for there was no shepherd, and my shepherds did not search for my sheep; rather, they kept feeding themselves and did not feed my sheep,”’ 9 therefore, you shepherds, hear the word of Jehovah. 10 This is what the Sovereign Lord Jehovah says: ‘I am against the shepherds, and I will demand an accounting of them for my sheep, and I will dismiss them from feeding my sheep, and the shepherds will no longer feed themselves. I will rescue my sheep from their mouth, and they will no longer be food for them.’”

I totally agree with all statements made above.  I have also had one very needy person (could not read or write from Iraq) who monopolized a lot of my time and later found fault with other sisters who did not do the same..... So I learnt through hard experience that we must focus on  "spiritual enrichment " first.
Because we really care, people can see this and take advantage.  Most other churches only focus on "social injustices" and these type of issues by having food banks etc.   I have had people directly ask me if we have "social assistance" because they think all Christian churches focus only on this.
This charity in itself is wonderful - but these Christians have not been given the job by Jehovah as the "faithful and discreet slave" to dispense spiritual food to the rest of the world. All of us has this important commission as those " who are grabbing the skirt of the Jew".   So I now try to imitate them by being "faithful" and 'discreet' - using good judgment regarding focus (and even your own safety) - in these communities. 
Many of them have been traumatized by war (or the way their society operates) and are truly pitiful - but they have no spiritual need.  Most come from communities where a standard of life (the family gold and how much you can pay for a wife) is important.  So we must learn how they think and learn to distinguish who wants "things" and who truly has a spiritual need. 
I have found some (mostly women) who cannot focus on a study because they have just too many emotional stresses because of extreme poverty. Women tend to show this kind of stress very quickly and some have husbands who beat them etc.  In these cases I have helped them fill out forms to get the appropriate social services. However,  I am very careful to come between a husband and wife because we cannot (by helping) be blamed for things that go wrong afterward - so I give only emotional support in these cases.

Melinda.
Always I read your commentaries, I just simply react: (Acts 26:28) “In a short time you would persuade me to become . . ."  your follower
 

And even in the first century Christian congregation, the apostles delegated the work of social services to the ministerial servants so they could devote themselves to preaching and teaching and shepherding.  But as Arauna and others have pointed out social services such as seeing that the widows  did not starve was a "necessary business".  (Some even sacrificed their properties to help those visiting Jerusalem.)
*** it-2 p. 409 Minister ***
An example of the principle governing this arrangement may be found in the action of the apostles when problems arose as to the distribution (literally, the service, di·a·ko·niʹa) of food supplies made daily to those Christians in need at Jerusalem. Stating that it would not be ‘pleasing for them to leave the word of God’ to concern themselves with administration of material food problems, the apostles instructed the disciples to “search out for yourselves seven certified men from among you, full of spirit and wisdom, that we may appoint them over this necessary business; but we shall devote ourselves to prayer and to the ministry [di·a·ko·niʹai] of the word.” (Ac 6:1-6) This was the principle; but it does not necessarily hold that the seven men selected were, in this case, not qualified as “older men” (pre·sbyʹte·roi), for this was not a normal or regular situation but a special problem that had arisen, one of a rather delicate nature due to the feeling that discrimination existed because of nationality. Since it affected the entire Christian congregation, it was a matter calling for “spirit and wisdom,” and thus the seven men selected may, in fact, have been in a spiritual sense “older men.” But they were now taking on temporarily an assignment of work such as that which “ministerial servants” might normally handle. It was business that was “necessary” but not of the same importance as “the ministry of the word.”
I am not as good at "charging" scriptures as Comfort is, but I am thinking of this scripture right now : "Let the dead bury the dead, but you go away and declare abroad the kingdom of God". (Luke 9:59,60)  In other words let those who are not conscious of their spiritual needs look after the mundane needs of others of similar attitude. Nothing should crowd out our main spiritual activities. Let them (the refugees) use up the designated authorities for this; but at the same time not deadening our consciences. Where we can help we would but not making it our main focus or letting it distract us. (We are not encouraging people to become "rice Christians".)
(1 Corinthians 2:6) Now we speak wisdom among those who are mature, but not the wisdom of this system of things nor that of the rulers of this system of things, who are to come to nothing.
These designated authorities are to come to nothing.  They are spiritually dead right now as they care nothing about Jehovah's purpose.  Let them look after the mundane things; true Christians focus on the urgent work of helping others get the real life that is promised.
 

And even in the first century Christian congregation, the apostles delegated the work of social services to the ministerial servants so they could devote themselves to preaching and teaching and shepherding.  But as Arauna and others have pointed out social services such as seeing that the widows  did not starve was a "necessary business".  (Some even sacrificed their properties to help those visiting Jerusalem.)
*** it-2 p. 409 Minister ***
An example of the principle governing this arrangement may be found in the action of the apostles when problems arose as to the distribution (literally, the service, di·a·ko·niʹa) of food supplies made daily to those Christians in need at Jerusalem. Stating that it would not be ‘pleasing for them to leave the word of God’ to concern themselves with administration of material food problems, the apostles instructed the disciples to “search out for yourselves seven certified men from among you, full of spirit and wisdom, that we may appoint them over this necessary business; but we shall devote ourselves to prayer and to the ministry [di·a·ko·niʹai] of the word.” (Ac 6:1-6) This was the principle; but it does not necessarily hold that the seven men selected were, in this case, not qualified as “older men” (pre·sbyʹte·roi), for this was not a normal or regular situation but a special problem that had arisen, one of a rather delicate nature due to the feeling that discrimination existed because of nationality. Since it affected the entire Christian congregation, it was a matter calling for “spirit and wisdom,” and thus the seven men selected may, in fact, have been in a spiritual sense “older men.” But they were now taking on temporarily an assignment of work such as that which “ministerial servants” might normally handle. It was business that was “necessary” but not of the same importance as “the ministry of the word.”
I am not as good at "charging" scriptures as Comfort is, but I am thinking of this scripture right now : "Let the dead bury the dead, but you go away and declare abroad the kingdom of God". (Luke 9:59,60)  In other words let those who are not conscious of their spiritual needs look after the mundane needs of others of similar attitude. Nothing should crowd out our main spiritual activities. Let them (the refugees) use up the designated authorities for this; but at the same time not deadening our consciences. Where we can help we would but not making it our main focus or letting it distract us. (We are not encouraging people to become "rice Christians".)
(1 Corinthians 2:6) Now we speak wisdom among those who are mature, but not the wisdom of this system of things nor that of the rulers of this system of things, who are to come to nothing.
These designated authorities are to come to nothing.  They are spiritually dead right now as they care nothing about Jehovah's purpose.  Let them look after the mundane things; true Christians focus on the urgent work of helping others get the real life that is promised.
 

I don't know a lot about moon worship. But I do know about the moon. I like it.

Arauna.

I subscribe your commentaries. The Watchtower recommendations about helping refugees in material sense should be seen with balance. Yes, Jesus and apostles helped poor people even with money (Jn 13:29).

My experience in this field has to do with a “fight” with my wife. She is all heart. Any refugee, or newcomer to our country she tries to help them with forms, with social counsel and so. Yes, obviously these people react with appreciation, as I would do in similar circumstances. But let me be crystal clear. Only ONE of these persons consume an enormous quantity of time (for me, most valuable than money). I mean, helping with official papers, doctors, hospitals, social rights, understanding of local law… Believe me, ONE person, ONE family, consumes a lot of resources. Well, please, don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying no help, or a merely testimonial help. But we’ve found more useful to address these people to social services. They have more skills, more time and more resources than us.

Even more, we avoid the situation (very common) that these people showing interest in our message only because need material help.

Please, again, I’m not saying that we should only preach them without provide material help. But I wish to point out the same as Arauna: balance

The best help - gift -  we can give anyone is to teach them about Jehovah!   It lifts them out of despair and gives them hope  for a future - something to look forward to!   Many live in poverty (with its associated crime and ignorance) and realize there is no way they will ever get out of their circumstances - they do not have the education or money or opportunities..to get out of their country or circumstances...  Some fathers start to drink/use drugs with the little money they earn and increase the suffering of their families because they are desperate and do not know the way out.  (I lived 48 years in Africa before moving to Europe and later in America - now in Sweden).  I saw such extreme poverty that I was stunned by it... and realized that only the message of Jehovah can give hope for a future life.
We are very materialistic in the West!  Jehovah promises us to come out of Armageddon only with our "life" - no other things.  What is the most precious gift we have - it is our life!  I think the very poor and deprived sometimes understand this more than affluent people do!  (This is why affluent people make issues of very small things because they are not wondering where their next meal is coming from for their family!) When I see the smiles of our brothers in Africa, and know that many of them only have the minimum to survive, and yet they have such joy! ... my heart is happy to know that someone took the time to teach them the truth!
I  worked amongst Arab speaking refugees in America - sometimes more than 100 hours and spent some 30 to 40 additional hours helping them with translations and filling out forms etc. ... and I have come to the conclusion that some just want "social help"  and focus more on material things.  They are not really searching for the "truth".  Some have a spiritual need but they are not prepared to let go of their "wants"  to reach out for the promises that Jehovah can give them. They are not spiritual people  but "fleshly".  They evaluate everything in only fleshly terms.  Of course we must teach them this but sometimes they just want to  "take" more than "give".  Because witnesses are so 'giving' these people can become predators.   So we must be careful to keep the right focus - first on spiritual help.   This is why it is wise to look after our own brothers and sisters first - and then reach out to others with "social works."
To be a truly Christian person we will not hold back kindness when it is possible to give it - but the most precious gift is the truth!  Of course (if it is in your power to do something do it).  I wrote letters for people who could not speak the language to get better housing or helped them to reduce bills ... I gave some help which does not involve money... and this giving spirit demonstrated to them the Christian way of thinking - to help others at sacrifice to self.  To give 'time' to help others.  But the focus of our time should be spent on teaching others the truth.  Our time is the most precious commodity we have!
Oh, I wanted to add another thought:   The witnesses are preaching in so many languages now that most people on earth can be reached in their own language!  Those who are living in "closed" societies - such as muslim countries where a bible is not allowed - these nations are now being shaken!  So these refugees are now coming out and being contacted with the truth!
I preach here in the streets giving out tracts.  Some come to me - and ask questions!   I make sure I show them how different we are to other Christians so they have a solid basis to go and think about... and later talk to the Witnesses again.  I feel about it this way - they are getting a Witness - very few are going to listen - but all need to get an opportunity!
Jehovah will resurrect those who are asleep in death - those who never had contact with the truth.  Many were good people and had a good conscience!  Jehovah is just and will not pass anyone by that may be a good future citizen of his Government. We must now focus on getting the "precious things of the nations"  out of the vicious world which will soon collapse!

Sometimes I have felt sorry for the majority of the population of the world, who (over the centuries) have never even heard of Christianity, not to mention that, even today, it's possible that most of the people on the earth have still really never heard of Jehovah's Witnesses. Of course, we still trust that Jehovah and Christ have taken all this into consideration for the time of judgment and, perhaps more importantly, throughout the time of resurrection. So this is not about who will survive Armageddon, and who won't; it's merely about the wonderful advantages of knowing about the teachings of Jesus and the freedom to make changes in your life based on taking these teachings to heart. Most of the world may not have the freedom to take advantage of true Christianity even if they have heard of it. Another large portion of the earth has heard about historical Christianity, and wouldn't go anywhere near it because of its terrible reputation for violence, deception and theft of resources. They won't give it the benefit of the doubt.
But even for persons who fall into that last category, there is hope that many more will benefit from exposure to Christian ideas and ideals -- even under the worst of circumstances. The latest study edition of the Watchtower (May 2017) nailed it in the timely article "Helping 'Foreign Residents' to 'Serve Jehovah With Rejoicing.'" Note:
*** w17 May p. 3 par. 2 Helping “Foreign Residents” to “Serve Jehovah With Rejoicing” ***
Worldwide, refugees who have fled their homes because of war or persecution now number over 65,000,000—the highest ever recorded.
The footnote expands on that idea:
*** w17 May p. 3 Helping “Foreign Residents” to “Serve Jehovah With Rejoicing” ***
In this article, we use the term “refugees” to denote those who have been displaced—whether across national borders or within their own country—by armed conflict, persecution, or disaster. According to the UNHCR (United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees), today “1 in every 113 people” worldwide is “forcibly displaced.”
Nearly 1% of the world's population!
Granted that this article is primarily about how we treat our spiritual brothers and sisters who are refugees. And I know that some have criticized us for focusing almost exclusively on other Witnesses, instead of ALL persons. (Even though I'd guess that non-JWs don't criticize each other for choosing their favorite charities.) Scripturally, there is nothing wrong with primarily taking care (materially) of our family, and after that those "related to us in the faith." And I think it's also true that even giving primarily to Witness refugees, will still give a good witness that some groups are much better than others at 'taking care of their own.'
(1 Timothy 5:7, 8) . . .. 8 Certainly if anyone does not provide for those who are his own, and especially for those who are members of his household, he has disowned the faith and is worse than a person without faith.
(Galatians 6:10) 10 So, then, as long as we have the opportunity, let us work what is good toward all, but especially toward those related to us in the faith.
One thing I like about the article is the balance. The bulk of the article is about ways in which we as JWs can help out refugees in material practical ways. Of course, there are a few paragraphs on spiritual support, too. In the past we've seen the same basic idea presented, but often with only a generic statement about material support and very few practical ideas for what we can do materially. This article talks about helping persons not just with providing food, clothes, shelter, but also with transportation, government paperwork, learning the language, applying for jobs, driver licenses, etc.
I think a lot of persons will also appreciate that the paragraphs on "spiritual support" included emotional support with spiritual support. I thought these two paragraphs were especially useful:
*** w17 May pp. 6-7 pars. 15-16 Helping “Foreign Residents” to “Serve Jehovah With Rejoicing” ***
15 More than material assistance, refugees need spiritual and emotional support. (Matt. 4:4) Elders can help by obtaining literature in the language of the refugees and by helping them contact brothers who speak their language. Many refugees have been torn away from their tight-knit extended families, communities, and congregations. They need to sense Jehovah’s love and compassion among their fellow Christians. Otherwise, they may be drawn to unbelieving relatives or compatriots who can relate to their culture and experiences. (1 Cor. 15:33) By making them feel fully accepted in the congregation, we have the privilege to share with Jehovah in “protecting the foreign residents.”—Ps. 146:9.
16 As with young Jesus and his family, refugees may not have the option of returning to their homeland as long as their oppressors remain in power. Further, as notes Lije, “many parents who saw family members raped and murdered cannot bear to bring their children back to where those tragedies occurred.” To help those who have experienced such trauma, brothers in lands receiving refugees need to have “fellow feeling, brotherly affection, tender compassion, and humility.” (1 Pet. 3:8) Persecution has caused some refugees to become withdrawn, and they may feel ashamed to talk about their suffering, especially in the presence of their children. Ask yourself, ‘If I were in their position, how would I like to be treated?’—Matt. 7:12
The article reminds us that we should be known for being concerned with good works, not just the preaching work. This fits a lot of ideas that have been mentioned in the recent past showing how sometimes doing good for persons in a material way, really is a spiritual work, and can be related to our sacred service. 

I don't have a problem with "morons" either, but only if we are fair and balanced and willing to refer to the Bible Students and early JWs as "morons" for following the instructions to do the same thing with loudspeakers, amplified phonographs, and sound cars in the area of churches. (In Russell's day they targeted churches, but only with tracts, not loud preaching.)
My parents and their fathers (my grandfathers) did this, but the closest I ever got to that old-time preaching style, was wearing sandwich signs at the 1963 Peace on Earth convention in Pasadena. Sandwich signs had already lost their popularity by then, but the city servant or assembly servant had made a few for some reason. I was only 6 and I vaguely remember it dragged on the ground in front of me and I think I might have even tripped a time or two. I've seen the picture, and will ask my parents for a copy to post.

Isn't it a bit disrespectful to call them "Morons" ? Try instead to feel like Jesus did for the misled people. Feel sorry for them?

And what would one say if four Jehovah's Witnesses got married? 
And the other two, that were just a couple of Jehovah's Witnesses that got married were not attached in some way?

Some good reasoning there Melinda. In a nutshell, the worldly way is all about ME. The Christian way is about others, and putting Kingdom interests first.

People who are successful in this life made sacrifices to get where they are now, and some continue to make sacrifices.
See quote below from a successful writer/journalist, Thuy Yau.
“We have to make the choice between our immediate desires and the needs that will propel our dreams forward.
Fact is, it’s not wrong of us to have these immediate desires, these temptations to choose the ‘easier’ option’. It’s normal to feel that way. However, when we sacrifice what we want right now, we are saving our time and energy for something more important. Something that will bring us one step closer to our real goals. Something we truly want, not just something we want right now.
Maybe we don’t want to sacrifice our time, stability, personal life, sleep, health, stillness and sanity. Maybe it just feels too difficult. But I’ll tell you right now, I’ve sacrificed every one of these things at one point or another. I wouldn’t have gone from writing on a personal blog to working as a freelance writer/journalist, if I had chosen the easier option. I wouldn’t have grown as a person if I hadn’t made those sacrifices either.
If you want to be successful and achieve what you really want in life, you’ll have to make sacrifices. But when you reach the end of that mountain, you’ll be so very glad that you never gave up the journey.”
==
Note the sacrifices it took to arrive at the success she attained as a writer.
If people can make sacrifices to attain transient goals and treasures, what is so wrong for true Christians to choose to make sacrifices and focus on the real life (everlasting life in perfect conditions) which is promised in the scriptures. Paul’s letter to Timothy encourages us to choose the real life and not the illusions of this system of things.
(1 Timothy 6:18, 19) . . .Tell them to work at good, to be rich in fine works, to be generous, ready to share, 19 safely treasuring up for themselves a fine foundation for the future, so that they may get a firm hold on the real life.
 
Jesus Christ said to seek first the Kingdom of God not worldly things.
 (Matthew 6:33) “Keep on, then, seeking first the Kingdom and his righteousness, and all these other things will be added to you.
 
 (1 Corinthians 15:19) If in this life only we have hoped in Christ, we are to be pitied more than anyone.
 
(Hebrews 6:9, 10) 9 But in your case, beloved ones, we are convinced of better things, things related to salvation, even though we are speaking in this way. 10 For God is not unrighteous so as to forget your work and the love you showed for his name by ministering and continuing to minister to the holy ones.
 
We make decisions taking into consideration the real life promised in the Bible.
 
We talking about excellence in everything we do -  we are not talking about sloppiness, carelessness, leaving school without any qualifications or skills. We are talking about not using the world to the full so we may have more time to do God’s will.
 
(1 Cor 7: 29-35) 29 Moreover, this I say, brothers, the time left is reduced. From now on, let those who have wives be as though they had none, 30 and those who weep as those who do not weep, and those who rejoice as those who do not rejoice, and those who buy as those who do not possess, 31 and those making use of the world as those not using it to the full; for the scene of this world is changing. 32 Indeed, I want you to be free from anxiety. The unmarried man is anxious for the things of the Lord, how he may gain the Lord’s approval. 33 But the married man is anxious for the things of the world, how he may gain the approval of his wife, 34 and he is divided. Further, the unmarried woman, as well as the virgin, is anxious for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in her body and in her spirit. However, the married woman is anxious for the things of the world, how she may gain the approval of her husband. 35 But I am saying this for your personal advantage, not to restrict you, but to move you to what is appropriate and to constant devotion to the Lord without distraction.
 
People are not coerced to apply these scriptures.  Jehovah God has confidence that persons who understood the scriptures and the urgency to get on the side of His approval would do this willingly. He said prophetically on his Son’s coming to power as the King of God’s kingdom, people would offer themselves to do the King’s bidding.
 
 (Psalm 110:3) “Your people will offer themselves willingly on the day of your military force. In splendid holiness, from the womb of the dawn, You have your company of young men just like dewdrops.”
 
The important work that they would buy out time for is the preaching of the good news of his Kingdom which would solve all the problems now plaguing the world. People need to hear the real solution. (See Matthew 24:14 and Matthew 28:19,20.)
 
Paul further showed that we should buy out time for this.
 
(Ephesians 5:15, 16) 15 So keep strict watch that how YOU walk is not as unwise but as wise [persons], 16 buying out the opportune time for yourselves, because the days are wicked.
 
He warned also about materialism.  The more “successful” you are the more gadgets to care for, and service; more travelling, more appointments, parties, etc.  If you simplify your life there will be more time to get down to doing God’s business.
 
(1 Timothy 6:9, 10) But those who are determined to be rich fall into temptation and a snare and many senseless and harmful desires that plunge men into destruction and ruin. 10 For the love of money is a root of all sorts of injurious things, and by reaching out for this love some have been led astray from the faith and have stabbed themselves all over with many pains.
 
It was true in the first century too that some had left the faith because of reaching out for things that the love of money brings. The precursor to getting more money is usually higher education.
 
People who discern what God’s will is will cut down on or avoid things that would prevent them from living a simple life where they will have time for God and his purposes.
 
The apostle John also encourages us not to love the world and the things in it.
 
(1 John 2:15-17) Do not love either the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him; 16 because everything in the world—the desire of the flesh and the desire of the eyes and the showy display of one’s means of life—does not originate with the Father, but originates with the world. 17 Furthermore, the world is passing away and so is its desire, but the one who does the will of God remains forever.
 
True Christians want to do God’s will and remain forever after the disobedient world passes away. (Rev 7: 14). Those who fall asleep in death look forward to a resurrection to life in heaven or on a paradise earth. (John 10:16; Luke 12:32; Ps 37:10,.11)
 
So some persons make sacrifices to obtain more money and prominence in this life, whereas true Christians make sacrifices in this life to attain the real life, everlasting life.

To be fair, someone should report satisfaction statistics for those who have gone to (recent) college, for it is not free, and job openings do not necessarily greet graduates. Moreover, if you flame out today, you find yourself working at McDonald's trying to pay off the astronomical bills you have so far run up.
 

The sacred secret has now been revealed!   Eph 1:8-10-   Jehovah has been 'managing/ administering" his sacred secret throughout the millennia. We now understand the timeline of all the promises relating to Jesus as the future king of a government that will correct the "root-cause" of all of mankind's problems.

If Melinda Mills  wanted to save me from looking like an ass before the entire forum, she would write some letters to the GB and then tear them up.
Sorry, Melinda. It was Anna. My apologies.

Yes. This started late in 1981, a little before the GB member was disfellowshipped, but after he had been asked to resign from the Governing Body. These kinds of things were not typical, as far as I could tell, except around the epicenter of Brooklyn Bethel.
You're welcome. As I mentioned to Anna, I thought that this kind of thing was much more rare outside of the headquarters area. I appreciate getting a better picture from some of the anecdotes you have included on the topic.
Percy's case was the most extreme that I took personally, and which made my blood boil. There was another, but I won't tell it again now in any detail (about my sister being asked to put up with her violently abusive husband and to try more meekness, field service and prayer, because they didn't want to remove his privileges as a ministerial servant).
But please remember that these are told in the context of the time that they happened. We are nowhere near perfect, and we don't really claim to be, but we have all seen many improvements, especially in the last decade or two. And I think that all of us continue to expect more big improvements, some of which are likely to surprise us.
In fact, I was pleased that @Eoin Joyce didn't think this was the whole story (about Percy) and that @TrueTomimplied that such stories might be only partially true. When something that happened is extremely difficult to believe, then it should be that much less likely to ever happen again.
I notice that the question of dirty laundry and motive also comes up, which shouldn't be surprising. The question should be welcomed. If we are concerned about truth and justice and improvements and error and tradition and 'strongly entrenched things' then the common "refrain" will be the request to refrain. Accusations of pride and apostasy are expected too. Love for the brotherhood should override these minor obstacles, however, and we should do our best to imitate Biblical examples of faith and courage.
I appreciate the discussion. If we see error we should spotlight it. In the long run, this makes the light of truth shine more brightly.
(Mark 4:21, 22) 21 He also said to them: “A lamp is not brought out to be put under a basket or under a bed, is it? Is it not brought out to be put on a lampstand? 22 For there is nothing hidden that will not be exposed; nothing is carefully concealed that will not come out in the open.
 

Enhance Your Ability to Select    the Right Words Selecting the proper words involves mental effort and good judgement 
Even Wise King Solomon "pondered and made a through search" in order to find  accurate words of truth. 
Do you find it's often a challenge to come up with "delightful words?"
If so you may need to enlarge your vocabulary. 
One way to do this is to take a note of how words are used in the Bible & even in our Christian publications.
9 "Not only had the congregator become wise but he continually taught the people what he knew,
and he pondered and made a thorough search in order to compile many proverbs."
 10 "The congregator sought to find delightful words and to record accurate words of truth."
(Ecclesiastes 12:9,10) NWT  jw.org

"Melinda has her letters that she doesn't send. I have my books. We're all encouraged to have our say in our heart to Jehovah and leave it at that, wherever possible. Reveal stuff in the context of where it may help, and there are such times, but don't put it on the clothesline in the front yard where the whole world sees......"  ---TrueTom
 
Never wrote any letters; never sent any.  
Think Anna said she did that as a coping mechanism. Read again.