Smurfs and Jehovah's Witnesses

[The Librarian]

14 minutes ago, Anna said:

Let us know! Oh, are you being funny about the Smurfs? Did they have something to do with demonism?

I do remember the Smurf "urban legend" back in the 80's among us... however I had never heard this story. I have added it here only for archival reasons. I cannot vouch for it's authenticity or source. 

John Headroves was only ten when the horror happened. It has affected him to this very day. John lives on his own in Bar Harbor, Maine, USA and recalls the story of the demonised Smurf that changed his and the lives of his family forever.

Christmas Day

It was December, 1985. I remember it well as I had just watched Back to the Future for the first time and decided that Michael J. Fox was my hero. When I was old enough to regular pioneer and get my driving license, the De Lorean would be my first car. It would come in handy if I made a mistake whilst out in the ministry as I could go back in time and make a change for the better.
I grew up in a small house in Broken Bow, Nebraska. Family life as I recall was good. Broken Bow is a small city and was even smaller in the eighties. My grandparents had moved there from Northern California in the fifties, bought some land and built two houses, which they would eventually hand over to their daughters. They had lived with us for a while, but dad moved them into a home for the elderly as it had gotten quite difficult caring for them. I suppose the fact that my grandparents didnÂ’t like my dad had something to do with it. I do remember my nan telling me that it was dadÂ’s fault that her daughter had become a Witness. When my grandparents left, all wasnÂ’t lost. My motherÂ’s sister, aunt Jackie, lived next door, so it was kinda cool living so close to her and uncle Sam. They were both such warm people that cared for me and my older brother Brad so much.
I was raised a Jehovah’s Witness and as you know, we never celebrated Christmas. Aunt Jackie on the other hand wasn’t a Witness. The Truth never took a shine to her unfortunately, although she was a beautiful human being; always smiling and laughing and joking. Why Jehovah would want to kill her at Armageddon was anyone’s guess, but ‘who are we to question Jehovah?’ I thought to myself. A major plus for me and Brad was that aunt Jackie was a massive festive freak, which meant that we still enjoyed some of what Christmas and Easter had to offer, although always without our parents knowing of course. 
On Christmas Day at around eight in the morning, our bedroom door swung open letting the hallway’s light in. My father, Bruce stood at the doorway, half dressed and with a mug of coffee in his right hand. “Boys, it’s Christmas Day and you know what this means?” dad asked.
“We’ll be…I’ll wake up John and we’ll be down in a bit dad”. The words yawned out of Brad slowly.
“We’re leaving in just under an hour Brad. We don’t want to be late for the field service meeting, especially as the Circuit Overseer will be there. The Christmas Day field service arrangement is really special and we’re going to have a really good time!” dad said in a cheerful tone. Brad finally made sure I was up, teeth brushed, shirt on, tie on and downstairs in twenty minutes.
My parents always told us that the Christmas Day service arrangement was special as everyone was at home. They were right; everyone was home, especially all my classmates, which in no way was a good thing. Many of them bullied me because I was a JehovahÂ’s Witness and seeing them open the door in their pyjamas gave me a cold sweat. My only solace was that Jehovah saw everything and when Armageddon came, I would be the one laughing at them.

My Christmas Present

As we pulled into our drive, I saw aunt Jackie taking out some trash. She waved and smiled and gestured for me to go over. Dad gave me ‘the look’, which meant a mini warning was on its way. “Before you go son, remember we don’t celebrate Christmas because Jesus wasn’t born on the 25th of December”, father said sternly. I smiled and ran next door. I know I shouldn’t have, but I loved the warm fuzzy feeling of Christmas. Aunt Jackie always put up a beautifully decorated tree, stockings and the most Christmas lights you’ve ever seen all around her house.
“Johnny, where’s Brad?” aunt Jackie questioned.
“Brad has to answer some questions for his baptism, auntie, and so he’s gone to Brother Kendrick’s house”, I replied swiftly.
“But Brad is only eleven? Eleven! I thought your lot didn’t believe in baby or child baptisms”, aunt Jackie mumbled under her breath just loud enough for me to hear. “Now I know your dad and my sister don’t want me giving you and Brad any Christmas presents, but as you know, me and your uncle Sam don’t have any kids of our own and we view Brad and you as our own, okay?”
“Okay auntie”, I replied, eager to see what she had got me. Ever since I could remember, aunt Jackie and uncle Sam had gotten Brad and me presents at Christmas and on our birthdays and a lot of chocolate when Easter came round, although my parents never approved. Dad would always make my aunt and uncle give us the presents the next day, never the day of Christmas or on our actual birthdays. When Easter came round, we were never allowed to eat the chocolate eggs, although Brad and I would sneak some upstairs into our room when my parents weren’t looking. Every year, aunt Jackie brought us Easter eggs and each year, father told her she shouldn’t. Mum never threw them away though. She would melt them down and we’d all eat a dodgy chocolaty dessert which made no sense to me as I could never understand why we weren’t allowed to eat the Easter eggs but were allowed to eat them once they had transformed into something else.
“Johnny, here you go.” Aunt Jackie handed me a fairly large gift, camouflaged in dark red and gold reindeer littered wrapping paper. I reached out and thanked her with a hug. She hugged me so tightly. She always did. I couldn’t wait to see what was under that wrapping paper. I tore away at it until I saw the greatest cuddly toy I had ever seen. It was a Smurf!
“Oh thank you, thank you auntie” I beamed. The Smurf’s were everywhere! I adored the Smurf cartoon and had seen the Toys “R” Us in Lincoln, Nebraska turn blue with the amount of Smurf toys and merchandise that was on display.
“Now, run along home and don’t say anything to your parents. I’ll keep him safe here with me until tomorrow.”
As I left aunt JackieÂ’s home, all I could think of was my new best friend, my new Smurf teddy. I knew I couldnÂ’t tell my parents anything and kept my secret. That night, I couldnÂ’t wait to get to bed so that I could wake up and play with my new Smurf teddy.
Brad was still downstairs having a mini celebration with my parents as Brother Kendrick’s had told him he had passed all the baptism questions and would be baptised at the next circuit assembly. I was so happy for him. We needed to get baptised as soon as we realised this was the truth and I knew – even then at the age of ten – that I wanted to serve Jehovah forever. Where all the worldly children wanted to finish high school and move onto college, I couldn’t wait to finish school and become a regular pioneer. If I was really good, I might even make it to Bethel and serve in Brooklyn with uncle Anthony and aunt Susan, my father’s older sister. Uncle Anthony was such a zealous elder and had gained a really high position. He and aunt Susan were of the 144,000 anointed class and so had a direct relationship with Jehovah God. Imagine that!
I got into bed and leaned over to my bedside cabinet to turn off the lamp. I suddenly felt a chill come over me. ‘It’s the window’ I thought. I got up and walked over to the window and saw that the curtain wasn’t drawn to a full close. As I drew it shut, I saw something looking over at me from my aunt Jackie’s house. I stepped closer to the window. It was my Smurf! Aunt Jackie must have placed him in uncle Sam’s office window. As I drew the curtain over the window, I glimpsed something. It seemed as though my Smurf’s eyes had flashlights in them. They shone profusely. “Wow” I said out loud. ‘Their eyes light up too. That’s so cool’, I thought to myself.
As a kid, I would always try and make up my own dreams by imagining something. Every now and then, my thoughts would continue into my dreams and that happened that night. I imagined playing with my new Smurf friend and what it would be like to tell my classmates that I had a great Christmas present. I donÂ’t remember much of my dream, but I do remember having a conversation with my Smurf. From what I can remember, it was a lovely chat. I asked him if he wanted me to call him Hefty Smurf, after all, that was his name. He told me his name wasnÂ’t Hefty but Apollyon. I had never heard of such a name but he was adamant that I should call him Apollyon. He told me we would be the best of friends and our lives would be better for it.
I woke up at around seven twenty in the morning and ran over to the window to see Apollyon the Smurf. He wasnÂ’t there. Aunt Jackie or uncle Sam must have moved him. As quick as you like, I got dressed, brushed my teeth and ran out of the house. Uncle Sam opened the door and smiled at me.
“You’re here for your Smurf, aren’t you?”
“Yes uncle. Thank you uncle”. As I walked in, auntie Jackie knelt down to my height. “Give your auntie a kiss”. I gave her a rushed kiss and cuddle.
“Have you eaten breakfast Johnny?”
“Yes”, I lied. I wanted to see Apollyon so much and didn’t want to spend time eating cereal or toast.
“He’s over here, right where I left him yesterday”.
“You’re funny”, I said, smiling at auntie Jackie. She had placed him upstairs, obviously for me to see him, and then brought him back downstairs again. Aunt Jackie looked a bit puzzled at my ‘you’re funny’ remark.
She handed him to me. I reached out and pulled him towards me, hugging him tight. “Thank you so much!” I beamed.
“Off you go now John. There’s no point asking you to spend a second longer here with us as all you want to do is play with your new toy”, uncle Sam said in a regrettable but ‘it’s okay if you leave us now’ tone.
“Oh Johnny, tell Brad to come over as we have his present here”, aunt Jackie said as I ran out their front door.

 

My Smurf, Apollyon

Over the next few days, no one could detach me from my Smurf. We spent what seemed like every waking and sleeping hour together. I even tried bringing him to our family study night, but father wouldnÂ’t allow it. I never really liked our study nights. There was only so much a ten year old could learn about Abraham and Abimelech, plus, I had heard all this a thousand times before. It wasnÂ’t as if something had changed. We as JehovahÂ’s Witnesses had the real truth and because we worshipped Jehovah and loved him, he loved us and would save us when he brought Armageddon. At Armageddon, all the wicked ones would die and only JehovahÂ’s faithful people would survive and turn the earth back into a paradise. We would all be happy in paradise and would have lions as pets and beautiful houses by a lake.
I tried each night to get my SmurfÂ’s eyes to light up, but they wouldnÂ’t. I asked Brad to take a look but he couldnÂ’t get them to light up either. He asked auntie Jackie for the instructions but she said there were none. Was I seeing things?
A week had passed and Brad was staying over at a Brothers house. It was the first time Apollyon and I were on our own at night. It was then that it happened. I turned off the light and got into bed. As I pulled the covers over me and my Smurf, his eyes shone brightly. ‘Fantastic’, I thought. Finally, after a week Apollyon had come to life. To my amazement, he’d literally come to life. Now I know this might be weird for you to hear, but he started talking to me in that sort of high pitched Smurf voice. He told me that he loved me and that he would be my friend forever and ever. His name was Apollyon and he told me I was a clever boy for remembering his name from the dream. Apollyon went on to add that the good magic that allowed him to speak would be gone if I ever told anyone. I promised him it would be our secret. I was good at keeping secrets, unlike the others boys in my congregation. If they saw something that they didn’t like, they would run off to their parents and tell them. I was never like that. I kept myself to myself. I had a hard enough time as my dad was an elder, and I didn’t want to make things worse for me or for anyone else. So I definitely wanted to keep this secret.
We grew closer and closer over the next few weeks. Apollyon would tell me so many stories about the Smurfs and where they came from. I had no idea they were real people, and smart people too. Apollyon would help me with my homework whenever I got stuck. I wasnÂ’t the best maths student and my little cuddly Smurf would help me with my sums.
Apollyon never did like sleeping in one place. We would always snuggle to sleep together but I would often find him under my bed or BradÂ’s bed in the mornings. Brad asked me to stop putting him under his bed as he had his secret box under it and didnÂ’t want mum finding it. Why Brad would want to keep magazines under his bed in a box was a mystery to me at the time. Anyway, I told Brad that I would try and not place him under his bed anymore.
One morning, Brad woke me up and seemed angry.
“How many times am I going to tell you to keep your Smurf away from me?”
“Wha…”
“Don’t ‘what’ me John. You placed him around my neck and I woke up because I couldn’t breathe properly. Please stop doing this or I am going to tell dad and you know what he’s going to do.”
Brad threw Apollyon at me and walked out the room.
“Apollyon, you mustn’t go over to Brad’s side of the room. You’re going to get me into a lot of trouble.”
For the first time, my Smurf never replied. He just sat there like a lifeless cuddly toy. ‘He must be upset’, I thought.

 

The Incident

It was our turn to clean the Kingdom Hall that Sunday. As dad was an elder, it was his responsibility to buy the cleaning materials. After mum had picked us up from school, we went to the local Walmart and bought everything we needed for the Kingdom Hall clean.
Apollyon hadnÂ’t spoken to me for days now and I was really worried. He hadnÂ’t moved either. I kept him on my bed and held him when I slept but that changed nothing. What had I done wrong? I never told anyone that he was alive. Had the magic gone? I kept questioning myself, looking for answers.
It was time for us to get ready for the meeting. I got dressed and left the bedroom after Brad. Apollyon sat, lifeless on my bed as I closed the door.
When we got to the meeting, mum put the Walmart bag at the back of the hall in the cleaning cabinet that was housed in the literature room. The literature room had a wide window that looked directly onto the hall and platform, although the window-glass that once was there was no more. After shaking Brother ConwayÂ’s hand, mum sat us in our normal seats near the front. Brother Conway was always the first person at the hall and stood by the literature room door and welcomed everyone into the hall. His hands were always sweaty and I never liked shaking his hand but had to out of common courtesy.
A Brother from the Omaha East Congregation gave the public talk. Boy was it boring. He kept talking about the spirit of love that filled us all. Even at that young age, I knew there were Brothers and Sisters that didnÂ’t like us. The Smedley family for instance never liked us. I never knew why, but you could sense their fake friendship. Then there was the James family. I used to be best friends with their son Andrew, but his dad got disfellowshipped and we couldnÂ’t be friends any longer, or at least not like we once were. They always sat at the back of the hall and no one ever spoke to AndrewÂ’s dad. That was weird. Mum and dad told me that AndrewÂ’s dad had done something very bad and hurt Jehovah.
“When Jehovah sees that Andrew’s dad has come to love him once more, we can all start to speak to him again”, mum said. I could never understand that. What had Andrew’s dad done to make the creator of the universe sad? How bad must this man be?
Finally, the talk was over and we clapped our hands. You could always gage how good the talk was by the applause it rendered. As always, we sent our congregationÂ’s love back to the Omaha East congregation by clapping again.
During the song, mum went to the toilet. This wasn’t fair as Brad and I were never allowed to go to the toilet during the song. When mum came back, dad was already on the platform and conducting the Watchtower meeting. Dad was a fine elder and really liked the little ones in the congregation too. He encouraged us all by asking questions during the Watchtower meetings that were aimed at us. I think I still hold the record for being the youngest brother in the Broken Bow congregation to have answered. I mumbled the word ‘Jiova’ – or something that seemed like that – when I was nearly three.
Mother came back to her seat and looked at me. Her eyes became slits. She was doing that thing she did when she wanted me to answer her truthfully. It was her x-ray look, but she hadnÂ’t asked me a question yet.
“Why did you bring your Smurf to the meeting Johnny?” mum whispered in a stern tone. Ah, there it was; the question.
“Mum, I never…”, I gasped
I was taken aback. I had left Apollyon on my bed when I left the room. I closed the door, went downstairs, picked up my meeting bag, placed my prepared copy of the Watchtower in it and gotten into the car. How on earth did Apollyon open the bedroom door and get into the car?
“Don’t lie to me John.”
She took me by the hand and marched me to the back of the hall. I knew what was coming. It was so embarrassing. Although not as embarrassing as the time she yanked me by the ear all the way to the back of the hall.
Mum picked up the Walmart bag and opened it while looking angrily at me.
“There. What’s he doing in there?” she spat.
I looked into the bag and saw cleaning utensils but no Apollyon, no Smurf.
“Where mummy?” I said as I looked up at her.
She looked into the large paper bag. Her eyes widened. She looked puzzled. Then it happened. As my mum looked up and through the literature room window, she gave out a loud shriek.
I was a pretty short ten year old and couldnÂ’t see over the counter. I wish I had never looked around the corner at the thing my mother was shrieking at.
Apollyon was walking down the centre isle of the Kingdom Hall without a care in the world. Other’s started to yell and squeal. Sister Marsh screamed. Dad finally looked at the Smurf that was walking towards him. He turned white. I ran towards my Smurf. “Apollyon, no!!” I shouted. It was too late. Apollyon jumped onto the rostrum and shoved dad out of the way.
“Listen up y’all and listen up good”, he said in that squeaky voice I had grown accustomed to.
“Your time has come. You’re a fake organisation run by a bunch of fakes. Do you want new light? Here’s your new light!”
His eyes turned on and for a moment it seemed as though they were being powered by two nuclear power stations. They were so bright and the light filled the hall.
It took some time for my eyes to adjust. All I could see were black splotches intermingled with bright light and Watchtower magazines being flung left, right and centre. I’ll never forget the sound Apollyon made when my father started to shout out the name ‘Jehovah’. My ears cringed as Apollyon screamed. I looked up and saw him jump off the platform and run down the isle past me. He pushed open the Kingdom Hall door and shouted “If I don’t see y’all soon, have a Merry Christmas!”
The rest of the evening and those days were a blur. We moved out of our home and I wasnÂ’t allowed to speak with aunt Jackie or uncle Sam. Over the years, they did try to make contact, but even though I wanted to speak with them, I knew it best not to. Uncle Sam died of a heart attack some years later and auntie Jackie followed uncle Sam in death soon after as she lost her battle with cancer.
The incident with the Smurf tore my family apart. My parents stayed together but there wasnÂ’t any love there any longer. I spent years in therapy and it cost me a small fortune. I moved out to Maine in my late twenties and havenÂ’t been to the meetings in years. My dad wonÂ’t speak to me any longer either, although mum does, in secret of course. I now know why none of us spoke to AndrewÂ’s dad and that still upsets me.
I never saw Apollyon after that day. Will I ever see him again? I donÂ’t think so.

http://www.jw-archive.org/post/76938457260/ive-never-heard-the-actual-story-behind-the-80s?route=%2Fpost%2F%3Aid%2F%3Asummary

 

[James Thomas Rook Jr.]

21 hours ago, The Librarian said:

. Many of them bullied me because I was a Jehovah’s Witness and seeing them open the door in their pyjamas gave me a cold sweat.

That's why I got some fabric glue and sealed the front  of my pyjamas.

[James Thomas Rook Jr.]

That's NOTHING!

I was out in Service, and at one door a Teletubby answered, and invited me in. 

He led me down to his basement where the OTHER Teletubbies were, and they were listening to a religious tape by the Rev. Jerry Falwell, TV preacher.

Over in the corner were the remains of Brothers who we thought had moved to Oklahoma, but there was not much remaining.

I noticed the Teletubby, whose name I found out was Tinkie-Winky,  had what appeared to be intestines and blood dripping from his teeth, but I did not make the connection.

I left them with some brochures, a tract and an invitation to the Hall, and asked if they had any questions.

In unison they all asked as if one .. "Do you have cable?"

Back in the car they asked what took so long.

I shrugged and replied "Samo Samo".

I have Polaroids.

[James Thomas Rook Jr.]

... and don't even  get me started about Sparlock!

[Guest Nicole]

Wow that sounded like the Chucky movie